adakah cinta mencintai aku ??

adilkah jika aku mengatakan tidak pada setiap insan yang cuba mengenali diri ini?tetapi adilkah pula bagi dirinya jika aku benarkan segala, namun aku tidak ikhlas menerimanya?

adikah aku jika aku bertindak menyepikan diri daripada cinta?namun adilkah pula bagi dirinya jika aku mengatakan ya pada cintanya tetapi aku tahu semuanya akan berakhir dengan luka?

pernah dulu aku menyukai pada seseorang dan pintu hati terbuka aku terbuka untuknya, namun akhirnya aku hampa, kata cinta yang diluahkan tergantung tanpa tali.

setelah itu terpahat dihati ‘tiada cinta disini, tiada lagi kekosongan untuk diisi’…

sebenarnya aku masih mengharap pada yang tidak sudi, ramai yang menyoalkan kenapa mesti diri itu yang aku tunggu, meskipun aku tahu aku bukan pilihannya.

telah lama aku perhatikan dia, aku tahu dia amat menyayangi keluarganya, disitu aku tahu bertuahnya pada sesiapa yang bakal menjadi sebahagian dari keluarga itu.

sepanjang tempoh itu, aku cuba memahami mengapa dia berbeza dari teman-temannya yang lain yang lebih mengejar keseronokan bukan pelajaran, dan jawapannya dia mahu membela nasib keluarga.

makin lama aku mengenali diri itu, aku tahu dia amat melindungi adik-adiknya, terutamanya perempuan, dan disitu telah aku lihat sikap tanggungjawabnya sebagai lelaki dan wali.

telah bertahun-tahun aku cuba mengenali hati budinya namun tidak sekali pun kami bertegur sapa.

bersambung...

Cinta & Agama

agama mengajar kita tentang cinta , menerangkan kepada kita jalan cinta dan kasih sayang, agama juga menjelaskan kepada kita tentang siapa yang harus kita cintai dan bagaimana kita harus bercinta. cinta mempunyai banyak jalan dan cara, jalan yang biasanya dan selamanya dipenuhi duri,rintangan, sungguh sulit dan memerlukan kemahuan serta pengorbanan yang besar.

jika mencintai seseorang maka ia memerlukan perjuangan serta kesungguhan dalam menempuhi jalan cinta hingga sampai ke akhirnya. semua orang yang berkasih pasti tidak mahu kalau cintanya dibahagikan kepada dua atau diberi pada orang lain. cinta dan kasih sayang juga harus dicurahkan seluruh dan sepenuhnya pada yang dicintai itu.

oleh itu, hanya cinta Allah sahajalah yang harus dicintai, yang disembah, di puja, dan yang bertakhta didalam hati kita.

namun cinta Ilahi memiliki batas-batas yang tidak boleh dilanggar dan mempunyai hak-hak yang perlu ditunaikan . Abu Yazin Al-Bustani berkata "adalah bohong orang yang mendakwa cinta kepada Allah tetapi tidak menjaga batas-batasnya dan juga hukum-hukumnya." batas yang disebut ialah beramal kerana Allah , sesuai dengan ajaran-ajaran-Nya menunaikan segala kewajiban serta menjauhi larangan -Nya.

two side

when my love don't want me anymore,
it broke me apart,it really pain me.
guess i can deal with it.
but i don't think i could..

it takes long time to fix
to pick up every pieces that he left.
then there somebody try to help me.
he try to help me to recover
but after all had been said and done
i still miss him.
missing him..
miss him badly
wishing he miss me too.

i am so sorry..
you could be the one
you could be my everything and my hero
but it is only if i let you be
only if i can let it be
only if i can it the feeling go..
but his love always with me.

his like a scars on my heart..
like a thorn in my flesh
he took my breath away
now you try convince me that he not worth it??
don't you know you also cant fill my heart,
when he is the part that i missing.

what would you do when you're heart is in two places??
you will feel the heat, that's burn
and you're torn inside
you can feel the love
but you just cant reach it
but when you think you just found the right one
you just found it at the wrong time and place....

-end-

The Ugly Duckling

Once upon a time down on an old farm, lived a duck family, and Mother Duck had been sitting on a clutch of new eggs. One nice morning, the eggs hatched and out popped six chirpy ducklings. But one egg was bigger than the rest, and it didn't hatch. Mother Duck couldn't recall laying that seventh egg. How did it get there? TOCK! TOCK! The little prisoner was pecking inside his shell.

"Did I count the eggs wrongly?" Mother Duck wondered. But before she had time to think about it, the last egg finally hatched. A strange looking duckling with gray feathers that should have been yellow gazed at a worried mother. The ducklings grew quickly, but Mother Duck had a secret worry.

"I can't understand how this ugly duckling can be one of mine!" she said to herself, shaking her head as she looked at her last born. Well, the gray duckling certainly wasn't pretty, and since he ate far more than his brothers, he was outgrowing them. As the days went by, the poor ugly duckling became more and more unhappy. His brothers didn't want to play with him, he was so
clumsy, and all the farmyard folks simply laughed at him. He felt sad and lonely, while Mother Duck did her best to console him.

"Poor little ugly duckling!" she would say. "Why are you so different from the others?" And the ugly duckling felt worse than ever. He secretly wept at night. He felt nobody wanted him.

"Nobody loves me, they all tease me! Why am I different from my brothers?"

Then one day, at sunrise, he ran away from the farmyard. He stopped at a pond and began to question all the other birds. "Do you know of any ducklings with gray feathers like mine?" But everyone shook their heads in scorn.

"We don't know anyone as ugly as you." The ugly duckling did not lose heart, however, and kept on making inquiries. He went to another pond, where a pair of large geese gave him the same answer to his question. What's more, they warned him: "Don't stay here! Go away! It's dangerous. There are men with guns around here!" The duckling was sorry he had ever left the farmyard.

Then one day, his travels took him near an old countrywoman's cottage. Thinking he was a stray goose, she caught him.

"I'll put this in a hutch. I hope it's a female and lays plenty of eggs!" said the old woman, whose eyesight was poor. But the ugly duckling laid not a single egg. The hen kept frightening him.

"Just wait! If you don't lay eggs, the old woman will wring your neck and pop you into the pot!" And the cat chipped in: "Hee! Hee! I hope the woman cooks you, then I can gnaw at your bones!" The poor ugly duckling was so scared that he lost his appetite, though the old woman kept stuffing him with food and grumbling: "If you won't lay eggs, at least hurry up and get plump!"

"Oh, dear me!" moaned the now terrified duckling. "I'll die of fright first! And I did so hope someone would love me!"

Then one night, finding the hutch door ajar, he escaped. Once again he was all alone. He fled as far away as he could, and at dawn, he found himself in a thick bed of reeds. "If nobody wants me, I'll hid here forever." There was plenty a food, and the duckling began to feel a little happier, though he was lonely. One day at sunrise, he saw a flight of beautiful birds wing overhead. White, with long slender necks, yellow beaks and large wings, they were migrating south.

"If only I could look like them, just for a day!" said the duckling, admiringly. Winter came and the water in the reed bed froze. The poor duckling left home to seek food in the snow. He dropped exhausted to the ground, but a farmer found him and put him in his big jacket pocket.

"I'll take him home to my children. They'll look after him. Poor thing, he's frozen!" The duckling was showered with kindly care at the farmer's house. In this way, the ugly duckling was able to survive the bitterly cold winter.

However, by springtime, he had grown so big that the farmer decided: "I'll set him free by the pond!" That was when the duckling saw himself mirrored in the water.

"Goodness! How I've changed! I hardly recognize myself!" The flight of swans winged north again and glided on to the pond. When the duckling saw them, he realized he was one of their kind, and soon made friends.

"We're swans like you!" they said, warmly. "Where have you been hiding?"

"It's a long story," replied the young swan, still astounded. Now, he swam majestically with his fellow swans. One day, he heard children on the river bank exclaim: "Look at that young swan! He's the finest of them all!"

And he almost burst with happiness.

loVe anD hoPe

don't used to be apart from you
or to leave our love behind.
don't want to broke your heart,because,
you are everything to me
my heart and soul
i give you everything.
the love is beautiful.

there will no others for me,
your name will be in my heart until forever
no one can take you place
no one will be like you
you're my friend and my lover.
my love only for you and it
always be yours.

knowing you is the moment that i always treasure,
that's the moment i fall in love.
i know I'll be in your heart someday,
still hoping you will look upon me
and know that i always at your back.
and knowing that i adore you since the beginning.

you not mine..

you are everything to me,
that light my whole life
you are only until forever
holding hands tightly and share the love
you make my life shine, and make it bright

but now you're gone
all alone without you
where all your promises that you promise me before
you said we always be together
my heart is broken
because of i missing you
and where all the faith that you promise before

i'm sorry if it because of my fault
give me you hands and take this love
i cannot bare being alone
come back in my life
my love only for you
but then your love, its not mine.

Who??

It's me Fidah Razali